Sunday, July 15, 2018

A brief thought on handling life with love


               So for the past 2 days I have been jobless, last Friday after my shift my boss called me at 7PM while I was at Mcdonald’s and told me that the company was letting go of a few people. Of course I was one of them. They didn’t give me an explanation or anything like that, just a simple: “It was a decision made after much consideration” and a reassurance that they would give me a reference if needed. So there was a silver lining.
                You see that is what the focus is my readers; there is always something optimistic to focus on in life. In any situation the world may throw your way, humanity should look at it as an opportunity to grow, to move forward. I’ve taken on the habit of calling this simple belief system handling things with love. The idea stems from a life coach who I’ve been following; Coach Corey Wayne. He states (Sorry if I misquote a bit) the idea in the terms of relationships, the concept is simple and something I believe all of us should know. If your significant other is upset, if they would like to take a break or break things off with you or if there is an argument, handle it with love. The concept is more black and white than it sounds I believe in all honesty.
                I speak in examples in real life and so I believe writing it this way will probably work best for me too.        
                Picture this, you have a wife or a husband and you find out that they have been cheating on you with a co-worker or even a close friend that they have. For months you have been asking them about this person because you have had your suspicions. For months they have assured you that nothing has been going on, that the long nights are for work, or with other friends, that the texts are nothing as serious as you are assuming, they have you going crazy, acting like a stalker, constant arguments, mental breaks, losing yourself to the pitfall in this relationship. Eventually they admit it, maybe you found out about them. Maybe – God forbid- there is a baby getting involved out of wedlock.
                If the above becomes a reality, if you are forced to leave them or they leave you for any reason it would be understandable to be upset. You would be in the right to be upset, to yell and scream. But the idea behind the concept of handling harsh situations with love requires firstly that all of that anger and that rage  be moved passed, looked beyond and that it be allowed to dissipate in a way. Yes, I understand that sadness and anger are reasonable, especially when you have been wronged, but rather than allow it to control you and cause you to lash out, stalk their social media, attack their new relationship in someway and bad mouth them to your friends and family or even their friends and family. Most relationships that I have seen at least end harshly, with verbal violence and even in some cases physical violence, they end because one or both parties feel hurt and wronged. They allow their love to be diminished because the terms of their relationship have changed in a way that they did not want it to. In most cases one party ended it themselves because they don’t feel the same way that they used to before when the relationship was “Good”.  The other one, the “Victim” in a sense, begs and pleads and tries to get the first to reconsider or they just get angry and allows them to go after a few harsh words, they allow their love to be replaced with malice.
                But through what I will call research into countless readings of the relationship teachings of experts and comparing it to the actions and mistakes in other relationships of friends and family members. I’ve deduced that what they are attempting to teach is that when something horrible happens when someone does you wrong you must let them go with love, allow them to walk away if that is what they really want, you must smile and look to the bright side. Smile at them and tell them how you feel calmly with a gentle voice, ask them why, if you need to and then let them be, wish them happiness inside your heart and outwardly, tell them that you love them if you still do but don’t try to argue with them or change their mind, let what YOU want be known and let them make the decision to follow through.
                Inside yourself you must embrace your anger and your sorrow, the negativity cannot be avoided and it should not be diluted by things like liquor and drugs. Don’t let yourself wallow in things like self-isolation. Recognize that you feel this way, think about why you feel this way and for maybe about 3 or 4 days let yourself feel it so that it runs its course, then focus on yourself, think about something bigger than the thing that hurt you. A dream, travelling, think of something positive and surround yourself with things that are positive.  
                This goes for more than just relationships, life itself has its pitfalls, it also has its own tendency to do you emotional harm. Just like if it were your lover or partner were to do you this type of harm, it is in your best interest to look to the situation with optimism, to look to the future and allow this obstacle to become an opportunity. Never forget that one bad moment, one lapse in luck is not at all the end, every second of your life is a chance to advance your mission and purpose in life, to become a better version on you. Inside you is love and love is ultimately positive, love is optimistic and it is true happiness. Once you have realized that within you is an endless expanse of love and acceptance for all things, for all situations, after you can master this frame of mind you will find that you will smile more, you will have more energy and the little things that happen, things that once made you angry will no longer matter. You will be happier, less agitated, more positive you.
You will look at life with love.

I will at some point be referring some self-help books that I have been reading and life coaches that you might want to look into if you feel as though this information offer assistance or help. If you feel as though you need help. Admitting this is the first step to becoming who you truly need to be.

What I am currently reading is: The Edgar Cayce Handbook For Creating Your Future.
It is very informative, I will go over some of the points in this book as I read through it a bit more and finish it.

Remember you must read these books at least 10-15 times. And truly study and understand it.
You are an amazing person whoever you are and deserve to be who you truly want and are meant to be.

Thursday, July 12, 2018

Why I started my Blog

I wanted my first post to be spur of the moment so sorry if it seems a bit random lol

                Why did I do this? I’ve been going over that same question for myself for the past 2 days by now I’m sure. I don’t want to bore you – Whoever might be reading this with this right now – with an over embellishment of flowery verbiage and articulate imagery painted with well-constructed sentences. I kind of want to start this off by getting right to the point, I began this blog because I have nothing else. I don’t have anything at all in my life, in my soul. Yes I do have family and friends, I have a car and a job but I don’t have anything else that I am supposed to do, that I enjoy doing.
                I have always had a passion for writing, I have loved it since the day I was born I am sure. Since kindergarten I would write little stories, spending hours and hours on end in my own home and just making things up. I always told myself that this was what I was going to do with my life, this was what I wanted to do for the rest of my life and I just needed to do it. I wrote all day, every day until I graduated highschool. In all reality everything before this is just what motivated me up to this point in my life, I don’t want to go into too much detail. Every little moment in my life told me that I was born to do this one thing, to be an author, to live my dream. But when I graduated highschool, that all powerful moment in everyone’s life when they become an adult struck me while my eyes were closed and knocked me down. You find out that life is hard, you become stifled because bills begin to pile up and debt gets hard. Of course, not everyone’s life is like this exactly but what I am trying to say is life can get hard. It causes you to forget your dream, to forget what you really wanted and cause you to want to lose yourself. For me I would write as a hobby but forgot that it was what I told myself I would always do with my life.
                I distracted myself moving like a toy wound up by the back and made to move along a predestined rut. I was unthinking and lifeless, simply moving through the motions of being a working man, I ended up working in a call center for 3 years and I am still working in that same industry to this day never once thinking too much of my dream, I even tried to be a dentist. But as my life became dull, and I became less happy, less driven to go to work every day, I started writing more, writing every day, all day and I remembered what it was. I remembered who I was. I remembered my dream and I guess in a way this is my way of actually seeing it through.
                I made this blog mainly because I want to get this passion out there, I want to let the world see that a dream is possible. I started my blog because I want to take action and I want to share it with everyone out there in life. I want those who feel as though their dreams are unattainable to know that that isn’t the case.
                I want to share a piece of a regular mans life with those people who need to know that ordinary people aren’t barred from doing extraordinary things. And I am not being dramatic, I just realized one day that this thing, this reality that we live in is not pitted against us, no it is not a wall that is pushing us away, rather its just a road that is filled with glass and spikes and thick sand and it is really difficult to trek, but that does not mean it is impossible.
                Yes it will be hard and the road will not always be fun but, as long as your and my soul are strong and the heart is willing and determined it is possible. Maybe not today or tomorrow but eventually we can get there.
                This is my opinion on impossible and possible. This is just me; a regular guy tackling my dream, I need your help and in turn I hope that anything I write can help you, motivate you. I will try to post something at least twice a week if not more. If you are the type to pray please pray for me all those who are having trouble reaching their dreams and if you want I will pray for you, hopefully my research and my story and anything I share speaks to you.

I’ll see you later
With love and a smile.  

J. Kossette